Practical Exercises

  • Nightly Regime It's not what you do once in a while but what you do every day that counts. Every night empty your mind of the little hurts and grudges you have accumulated during the day. Do not let the hurts become a festering wound. Every night as you retire to bed, think of the people who have wronged you through the day—wronged you, harmed you, cheated you or taken undue advantage of you. Think of them all then call out their names one by one and forgive them verbally. Actually say, Mr. XYZ, I forgive you, I forgive you, I forgive you. Mrs. XYZ, I forgive you, I forgive you, I forgive you. Miss XYZ, I forgive you, I forgive you, I forgive you. You will have a sound sleep and you will have wonderful dreams. Do not wait for the wrong doer to come and ask for your forgiveness. Forgive even before forgiveness is asked.

  • Swap Positions Get an empty chair in front of you. Now imagine, the person you are angry with or the person you need to forgive sitting on the chair. Feel your emotions towards that person. Hurt, anger, hatred, bitterness, feel all the emotions towards that person. Now, swap your position, sit on the other chair and imagine yourself as that person. Contemplate how that person might feel after hearing about the deep pain or hurt or anger. You will realize that the person must have felt remorseful, disappointed about his actions upon hearing the painful emotions. After this, go back to your original position and respond to that other person. You will realize this time that the anger or bitterness has shifted and you will feel compassion for that person. This process enables you to feel differently – empathy and compassion – about the wrong doer.

  • Cut the Cord Make a mental list of all the people in your life you are holding a grudge against, close your eyes, and visualize a negative cord of energy attaching you to that person. Next take a deep breath and see that cord being cut with both of you gently floating apart, releasing the negative energetic bind. Continue to do this until you feel you have released the experience. If you are still struggling, write an unedited letter to the offender expressing all of your feelings. Read the letter to a trusted friend or simply aloud and then burn it someplace safe. Visualize the energetic cord being cut while you are burning the letter and silently repeat, I am FREE. Repeat the releasing process as needed and watch what shifts in your life.


  • A beautiful young girl working in a reputed organization would find it difficult to wake up in the morning to go to work. The work environment in the office was not congenial. She would be rebuked and ill treated for minor issues and for things for which she was not responsible. The situation was unbearable. Tension started building up within her.

  • She applied for a position in another department. A colleague played politics and got the position for which she was more qualified. This she was never able to forget. The atmosphere at home was not a pleasant one too. She had lost her father. Her mother was going through a depression. She didn't have anyone to look up to. She wanted to help her mother but she was so affected by her own state of mind, her negativity, feelings of bitterness and revenge for her colleagues that she did not have the strength to do so. She was slowly losing control of her life.

  • "It is better I end my life now, everyone hates me so much", she thought to herself. She was on the verge of committing suicide as she could take it no more. She happened to attend a Moment of Calm youth event where she witnessed a theatrical performance based on forgiveness. Her heart was touched. She thought, "Why not give it a try?" She made a firm resolve to stop blaming others for her problems and decided to forgive her colleague for backstabbing her. Slowly she let go of her negative feelings for her colleague and her heart was filled with peace.

  • One young woman, who volunteered to help with the program, described how, as a single mother of an only child, she was always irritable and impatient. At the least provocation she would smack her son. But when she went into silence for the Moment of Calm, it suddenly struck her that she was being very harsh with her child. Instead she needed to forgive him for his mistakes and mischief and also treat him with love. With tear-filled eyes she made a new resolve. That evening she went down on her knees, hugged her son and said, "Please forgive me, I have been so hard on you. I realize now how wrong that was of me." From that day she has never raised her hand on him and peace reigns in her heart and home.

  • The Moment of Calm volunteers were campaigning in Garuda Mall, Bangalore. A depressed young man, an emcee by profession, happened to enter the mall during that time. He inquired about what was happening. After the concept of forgiveness was explained to him, he related that he had just been cheated off a lot of money by his girlfriend who had left him. He looked extremely depressed and heartbroken. "I want to end my life," he said. The volunteers realizing the seriousness of the situation started talking to him. They requested him to make an announcement in the mall regarding the campaign. He readily agreed to do so. As making the announcement, he went a step further. He told the volunteers, that he was willing to forgive his girlfriend. The volunteers made him say, "I forgive you ABC (his girlfriend's name) three times."Immediately he felt lighter, as though a huge burden was lifted from his heart. He was awed by the timing of the event. It was exactly when he needed it. He left the mall feeling happier realizing that - Providence had changed his destiny.

  • A little girl writes a note to her mother, "I forgive you mamma for not wanting me. I know you wanted a son but I will be the best daughter I can."

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